


i wasn't able to run to you

by cute_lil_fluff



Series: svt requests: december '19 - march '20 (part one) [5]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Anxiety, Crying, Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Insomnia, M/M, Sleep Deprivation, jeonghan is a good hyung, lots of cheese
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-06
Updated: 2020-01-06
Packaged: 2021-02-25 15:15:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22138186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cute_lil_fluff/pseuds/cute_lil_fluff
Summary: "Sorry," Jun whispers, shaking his head a little to dissipate the fuzzy feeling that seems to be overtaking his senses. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to." Minghao is a little startled by the sudden edge to his voice, almost frantic as his words merge together.
Relationships: Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi/Lee Chan | Dino/Wen Jun Hui | Jun/Xu Ming Hao | The8, Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi/Wen Jun Hui | Jun, Wen Jun Hui | Jun/Xu Ming Hao | The8
Series: svt requests: december '19 - march '20 (part one) [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1577896
Comments: 13
Kudos: 222





	i wasn't able to run to you

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MurderRose](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MurderRose/gifts).



"Jun-ah." Minghao scolds, grabbing Junhui's wrist, his spoon- loaded with cereal and milk- close to tipping all over the elder's lap. Junhui, looking so zoned out, just blinks at Minghao as he guides his hand back towards his bowl. He drops his spoon in favour of clasping Minghao's hand in his.

"Sorry," Jun whispers, shaking his head a little to dissipate the fuzzy feeling that seems to be overtaking his senses. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to." Minghao is a little startled by the sudden edge to his voice, almost frantic as his words merge together.

Minghao frowns, suddenly concerned. He takes his eyes from Junhui for a second to glance at Soonyoung who is sat across from them, curled up on his chair and munching on his own cereal. Soonyoung is frowning as well, watching Jun with narrowed eyes.

It's hard for Jun to hide it from the rest of the performance unit when he has a bad night's sleep. Minghao wakes up whenever Jun gets restless, like his body is in tune with when he might need help. Soonyoung is usually stirred by the door being opened, whether it be someone nipping to the loo in the middle of the night or escaping to curl up on the sofa because they just can't switch their brain off. And as soon as Soonyoung is awake, so is Chan. That's unavoidable.

Last night had not been a good one for Junhui. It's something he's always struggled with, these bouts of insomnia sparked by seemingly nothing, and it always sets him off on the wrong foot for the day. He'll get sleepy and sensitive and maybe a little sad, and he never really fares well.

Nowadays, the boys are pretty quick to intervene when he has a bad night. They try to help him get as much sleep as possible because their schedules are not very forgiving, even less so when you've slept for a total of two hours. Where they can, they convince him to take time off. Sometimes it's not possible, but on days like today, thankfully it is.

Minghao and Soonyoung, and a couple of the others, have to go back into the studio to record some more bits and pieces with Jihoon but everyone else is pretty much free to do whatever. Some will be catching up on dance practice or writing lyrics, and Junhui will be resting.

Minghao and Soonyoung had left Chan curled up in bed when they'd gotten up- he won't be happy to wake up on his own but hopefully he'll be more grateful for the lie in. Junhui should have stayed in bed too, but he was already awake and lying in bed any longer was going to send him insane.

But now he's practically asleep at the kitchen table anyway.

Well, he's not asleep. He's just out of it. More so than usual.

Minghao leans forward to draw Junhui into a hug, Jun's head tucking into the familiar space beneath Minghao's chin. His frown deepens when he feels just how much Junhui is trembling. "Hey, it's okay." Minghao murmurs, stroking a hand across Jun's broad back, pushing gently at his tense muscles. "Don't worry about it."

Junhui just sighs, grasping at the fabric of Minghao's jumper and settling against him, eyes slipping shut. It's been a slow morning and Jun just wants to be held. Minghao peers down at him, using a finger to brush a strand of Junhui's soft hair behind his ear, revealing his eyes, heavy bags hanging beneath them.

He meets eyes with Soonyoung over Junhui's shoulder and he's still scowling. When he notices Minghao looking, he tilts his head to the side as if he's asking _who has made my Junhui upset and can I hurt them?_ Minghao gives him a sad smile.

"Jun, sweetie, is something going on? You seem so down." Minghao asks, keeping his voice light and his hand in Junhui's hair. Jun snuggles closer, the top of his head bumping against Minghao's chin. As soon as Junhui presses his nose into the dip of his collarbone, Minghao knows that he isn't going to talk. "Baby, you should try and get some rest. Once we're gone, you can try to get some more sleep, yeah?"

"Can't sleep. I can never sleep." There's that edge again, that frenzy in Junhui's voice which makes Minghao never want to leave him, that makes him worry that Jun is struggling with something and not telling him. Minghao hums and tightens his hold on the elder, pressing a lingering kiss to the top of his head. Junhui settles, but only a little.

"Just lying down and resting will help, I promise. Trying, that's all I ask of you." At this point, Soonyoung abandons the rest of his breakfast in favour of joining them, pulling a chair up close so that he can wrap himself around Jun's back, a cheek pressed against his shoulder blade.

"We'll find someone to snuggle with you. It won't be hard, not with that face." Junhui chuckles a little bit, but it's a sad sound and it's muffled in the fabric of Minghao's jumper. Soonyoung coos at him anyway, hands sneaking around to stroke up and down Jun's thighs, tickling his knees a little through his baggy pyjama bottoms.

"Come on, finish your breakfast. You too, Soonyoungie." Minghao encourages. Soonyoung returns to his seat reluctantly and Jun sits up again, but his little frown doesn't disappear until Minghao lays his hand on the back of his neck, fingers stroking softly along his hairline. It feels like he's going to fall apart if he breaks contact with Minghao for more than a second.

"We won't be gone for long," Minghao says- Junhui nods a little distractedly as he scoops up the last of the milk from the bottom of his bowl. As soon as it's empty, he sets the bowl down on the table and is immediately pressed up against Minghao's side once more. Minghao kisses the crown of his head and holds him close.

When he hears the other boys begin getting ready to leave, Minghao nudges at Junhui's forehead with his nose so that he will look up. "Hey." He coos when he notices the tears gathering beneath Jun's eyelashes. Jun blinks, trying to get rid of them, but Minghao cradles his jaw in his hands and runs his thumbs along Junhui's cheekbones to relax him. "It's okay. We'll be back before you know it."

"I know," Junhui replies, his voice high and wobbly even as he tries to mask it. "I'll just miss you." Minghao coos again, ducking his head to press a lingering kiss against Jun's lips.

"I'll miss you too, baby." Minghao kisses him again because he just looks so sad and he can't resist. They're only interrupted when Soonyoung comes bounding back over, wrapping Junhui up in his arms again.

"Me too, Junnie! I'll miss you too." He cries dramatically against the top of Jun's head, practically bending himself in half in order to press a cluster of kisses into his skin. Junhui can't resist the grin that takes over his face- it's impossible to be sad with Soonyoung around. He twists himself in Soonyoung's grip to give him a proper hug, his face pressed against Soonyoung's warm chest.

*

"No, Mingyu. You shouldn't put that metal can in the microwave." Jeonghan says, his voice dry. Junhui snorts against his stomach, picturing the scathing look Jeonghan must have on his face as Mingyu whines and retreats. Jeonghan's hand continues brushing the tangles out of his hair, gentle fingers working through the strands.

"Jihoon-ah? Would you go make sure that he doesn't set the dorm on fire, please?" Jeonghan asks, sounding exactly like the mother he claims not to be, delegating tasks to his children. Junhui snuggles closer.

Jihoon lets out a long sigh. "Why me, hyung? Why can't you do it?" They all know that Jihoon will always do whatever Jeonghan asks of him, he's just arguing for the sake of it. He gets stubborn when he's tired, but he's not petulant.

"You know when you have something cute sleeping on you, you're not allowed to move. That's the rule." Is how Jeonghan chooses to reply. It must work, because Jun hears Jihoon getting up, chuckling a little as he heads through to the kitchen to curb Mingyu's destructive whims.

A faint, but terrified, "Mingyu-yah!" comes from the next room.

"I'm not asleep, hyung. You can get up." Junhui insists, making a move to uncurl himself from around Jeonghan's waist. Jeonghan just tuts, grasping Jun's shoulder and pulling him close again. Jun hides his face happily, humming when Jeonghan starts rubbing slow circles into the spot between his shoulder blades.

"No, bug. You stay right here. You look comfy." Junhui nods, forehead rubbing against the fabric of Jeonghan's top. Jeonghan smiles down at him.

Chan had left for the dance studio before realising what was going on, so when Junhui had gone to find him for a snuggle he'd been disappointed. Ever since then, he's been clinging onto Jeonghan, following him around like a lost kitten as he'd tidied his room and stolen some of Jisoo's snacks from beneath his bed and finally settled on the sofa with a movie playing on the telly.

Jeonghan is happy to indulge him.

"How are you feeling, little one?" Jeonghan asks, carding a hand through Junhui's soft hair. "Hao said you didn't sleep very well." Junhui squirms a little, unsettled. He doesn't like complaining or making a fuss, but Jeonghan wants to know that he's okay.

"I'm fine, hyung." Jun eventually replies, not lifting his head.

Jun has been sprawled across his lap for the better part of an hour, so Jeonghan's legs are dead asleep. He doesn't want to tell Jun this, because he'll apologise and feel bad and Jeonghan never wants to upset him, especially not when he's already feeling so fragile. Instead, he squeezes the back of Junhui's neck, smiling when the younger looks up at him.

"You know, I'm not feeling all that awake either. I might go and have a lie down in bed. Do you want to come with me?" Junhui's eyes grow wide for a moment- Jeonghan can tell that, despite his best efforts to avoid it, Jun is still thinking through all of the ways he might have done something wrong. He's trying to figure out the 'true' meaning behind Jeonghan's words- _is he trying to get rid of me? Surely he doesn't want me to come to his room? He's sick of me._

"Hey." Jeonghan murmurs, leaning down to press a kiss against Jun's forehead. "You're okay. Come lie down with me. I'll get lonely if you stay here." Jun sighs, a little relieved. Sometimes that's the best approach with Junhui, just telling him what you need from him.

"Okay." Junhui sits up and eyes Jeonghan warily as he stretches his legs out, but he takes Jeonghan's hand easily when it's offered to him. Junhui traipses behind his hyung as he leads the way towards the vocal unit bedroom, hopping up onto the mattress and curling up beside Jeonghan without a word.

Jeonghan settles against his pillows and drags the blanket from the bottom of the bed and up and over them before he speaks.

"Junnie-yah?" Jeonghan asks, his voice soft, lilting. Jun's eyes are suddenly so much sadder as he sighs, blinking at the pillowcase beneath his head, like just lying down has reminded him of all the reasons why he's been having a hard day. Jeonghan has no idea what's been spinning around in his head all morning, but it's worrying him. "Hey. If you don't want to talk, that's okay. Just let me know that you're alright."

"I'm alright." Jeonghan doesn't really believe him, not when his voice is beginning to tremble in that tell-tale way. But he's not going to push it. If Junhui doesn't want to tell him something, he's in no position to force it out of the boy. At least he knows that Jeonghan is there if he needs him.

It's only a few minutes later when Junhui's resolve breaks down and he speaks up again. Jeonghan can see it on his face before he says anything. His eyes are tearing up and his lower lip is trembling. "Do you think-" Jun starts, but cuts himself off with a broken gasp. Jeonghan takes his hand, squeezing. "Do you think I'm doing a bad job?"

Junhui's voice tapers off as a whine as the tears begin to fall. He buries his face in the pillow, not letting Jeonghan see him. Jeonghan isn't fazed- he shuffles closer and wraps Jun up in his arms. "Hey, hey there. What are you talking about? Of course not."

"I am, though. _I am_." Junhui has to cough around his next breath, he draws it in that fast that it sticks in his throat.

"Baby, no. Can you take a deep breath for me?" Jun tries his best, but it's hard with his nose buried in fabric. "There you go, that's it." He strokes a hand over the back of Jun's head, scratching lightly at his scalp and humming softly to relax him. Eventually, Junhui huffs out a frustrated breath and rolls over onto his back.

Junhui wipes his tears away with a fist and hides his face in his palms. "Why am I so sad?"

"Oh, honey." Jeonghan feels his heart clench, the sound of tears in Junhui's voice too much to handle. Jun doesn't deserve to feel any of this. He's so good to everyone and yet he continues to struggle with his own thoughts, it's not fair. "Oh honey, I'm so sorry." Jeonghan hovers over Jun and combs a hand through his hair.

Junhui doesn't say anything else, he just whimpers against his hands as Jeonghan coddles him. At least he's not panicking, but still, an upset Junhui is not a fun sight to see. "Junhui-yah, you are exhausted. I'll nap with you, but you _need_ to get some more sleep."

Jun looks reluctant, blinking at him through teary eyes. It's like he builds up this complex in his mind when he can't sleep, believing that he'll feel awful for even trying. But when Jeonghan lays down and opens his arms, Jun rolls into them, settling against his hyung's chest. Jeonghan presses a kiss against his forehead. "You'll feel a bit better when you're not so tired, and Minghao will be home by then. I promise you won't feel like this forever."

Junhui doesn't respond in words, but Jeonghan can tell that he only half believes him. He does snuggle closer though, letting his head rest against Jeonghan's shoulder and closing his eyes, so that's something.

*

Jeonghan wakes up when the mattress dips, opening his eyes to the sight of Minghao pressing a kiss to Jun's cheek, who is still sleeping soundly. Jeonghan watches as Minghao watches Junhui fondly, dragging a gentle knuckle along the line of his jaw and smiling at the way his lips twitch.

When he looks up and meets Jeonghan's eyes, Jeonghan doesn't know why he is startled by the sheer amount of love held in them. It's obvious to everyone how much Minghao adores Junhui, as both a hyung, a friend, and a lover. But to witness the true intensity of it, this quiet devotion as Junhui lies unaware- it's staggering.

He's hit with a sudden surge of pride- _his babies are in love_.

"Has he been asleep for long?" Minghao asks, his voice barely a whisper. He keeps a hand on Junhui's neck even as he speaks to Jeonghan, fingers drifting slowly across his skin.

"A couple of hours," Jeonghan replies, giving Minghao a smile. "He had a bit of a cry beforehand. I don't think he's doing too well- in his head." Jeonghan's not very good at talking about this, feels like he's betraying Junhui's trust, but Minghao is probably already aware. He usually knows what's going on with Jun before Jun even knows himself.

As expected, he smiles knowingly, dipping his head to press another kiss against Jun's temple, lingering for a long moment. "His sleep always gets worse when he's stressed out. I'm waiting for him to come to me about it. He's been- preoccupied." Jeonghan nods.

They lie in a comfortable silence, Jeonghan watching Minghao smiling, Minghao watching Junhui breathing.

"You're good for him, you know. I'm still astounded- every time- by how well you two work together. You're just- you just fit." Minghao has to bite his lower lip to control the size of his grin. He lets his eyes slip shut and leans over Jun, pressing his face against Jeonghan's chest. Jeonghan pats his head.

"Hyung," Minghao replies, his smile infecting his voice in that sweet way he can never mask, making it soft and airy and adorable. "I just love him a lot."

"I know, baby," Jeonghan says into Minghao's soft hair. "And he loves you back."

At this point Junhui stirs a little and Minghao lifts up from where he's pressing Jun against the mattress, running a comforting hand across his chest to settle him again. He mumbles a few words Jeonghan doesn't understand against Jun's cheek and the older immediately settles back into sleep. Incredible. Who knew their excitable, hyperactive Wen Junhui could be settled so easily.

"Did you get everything finished at the studio?" Minghao hums, settling on his side next to Junhui, his cheek resting on Junhui's head, his hand laying flat on Jun's stomach. He looks back up at Jeonghan.

"Yeah, it didn't take long. Just a couple of bits needed doing. Jihoon thinks he'll probably finish the song tonight, then we can start choreographing, if Soonyoung hasn't started already." Jeonghan chuckles quietly. Soonyoung always gets started on their dances too early, getting bitter when Jihoon changes enough little sections to throw him off when they're played the final version.

He brings it on himself, though. Their little over-worker.

"That's good. It'll be nice to start learning it, to feel productive again." Minghao nods. They all try to appreciate their time off, but they can't hide their itch to improve and succeed that can only be achieved by actually working. "Let's just hope that this little one feels better before then," Jeonghan adds, nudging his nose against Jun's temple.

"I think he finds it easier when we have something to focus on. Stops him from getting so stuck in his own head." Minghao responds, but he's frowning, brows pinched. Jeonghan reaches a hand out to smooth the skin between them. "I really want him to feel better. He just feels _everything_ so _much_. I want him to be as happy as possible."

"Hey, you're trying your best. That's enough. You can't do everything, you can't force him to be happy, you know this. I promise, you're doing everything you can and it's working, Minghao-yah. Everyone can tell how much happier he is when he has you. It's like an instinctive reaction or something by now." Jeonghan's smile sets Minghao at ease. Minghao smiles back, nuzzling lightly against Jun's hair.

"Yeah. I'm glad that I can help, even just a little bit. He deserves the world."

**Author's Note:**

> god i've been having some major writer's block lately, but i managed to squeeze this one out for you. i've got so many of these request fics on the go but they are just not getting finished and i am sorry.
> 
> hope you enjoyed!
> 
> [my tumblr](https://hattieie.tumblr.com)
> 
> requested by [MurderRose](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MurderRose/pseuds/MurderRose) (honestly the most sweet and dedicated commenter, ily <3)


End file.
